You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.

(I've to backdate this entry. It was written yesterday.)

Malam kelmarin aku tak boleh tidur. Mungkin sebab masa berbuka puasa, aku makan serawa so perut jadi kembung semacam. Then stay up buat take-home test sambil minum nescafe. Otak jadi ligat berfikir kan bila minum nescafe lewat malam?

Susah gila test tu. No wonder kena bawak balik. Langsung tak faham apa dia nak. Adoi. I spent my whole night doing the first question only. Tu pun tak tahu lah betul ke tak.

I stopped doing the homework around 1 am and decided to go to bed. But my stomach was already bloated at that time so I couldn't sleep. Asyik terjaga je. Setiap jam terjaga and I felt the night was too long. Pergi toilet few times and around 5 am when I was actually sleeping, I was awoken by an SMS ringtone. My ex housemate back in Seri Kembangan had just lost her fiance due to cancer.

Another loss.

Innalillahiwainnailaihirojiun..

Seketika aku termenung. Mencari-cari memori bersama arwah. Jika ada pun, sekelumit cuma. We never talked much with each other. Tapi selalu terserempak cause arwah rajin datang rumah bawa tunangnya makan. Arwah looked fine.. badan dia sihat. Takde nampak dia tu sakit.. I bet he didn't know about it too..

Masa nak Raya wish kawan aku tu.. pesan juga, kahwin jangan lupa jemput. Di situ lah baru dapat tahu arwah sedang menjalani chemotherapy. Terkejut juga aku.

I hope she's strong. Losing someone who is so close to us is really one of the hardest things to deal with.

Semoga roh arwah sentiasa di bawah payung lindunganNya dan moga ditempatkan di kalangan orang-orang yang beriman.. Amin.


Al-Fatihah.







Credit : MrCool

I see stars.

Di office..

Tapi,

Tak boleh fokus, tak boleh fokus..

Sebab?

Kekenyangan yang melampau.

Apa je aku makan? Spageti sikit.. mee wantan sikit.. nasi impit... sate 4 cucuk.. dessert.. Tak makan sekaligus, makan sejak pukul 12..

Sekarang pukul 2.30.. masih terasa kenyang yang susah nak digambarkan. Haha.


Actually hari ni department aku buat 'open house'.. aku malas nak masak masakan Melayu so masak je lah benda yang dah biasa masak.. carbonara spaghetti dan mashed potato.

I wish I had my late Iphone now so I could snap some photos.. :(

Makanan dah habis dah pun by now. Alhamdulillah.. Seronok tengok orang makan.

Ok lah.. tak leh tulis panjang-panjang lah. Kenyang sangat. Relevant ke? Haha.

The gifts and the loss.

Bukan senang saya nak tulis entry ni.. Bercakap mengenai kehilangan. Mengenai kesedihan. :)

Sekarang dah dapat kekuatan sikit.. boleh la kot nak share barang seperenggan dua.

Tapi mari cerita hal happy dulu.

Raya kali ni ada kenangan tersendiri.. susah nak lupa. Dan tak banyak berjalan sangat.. Pergi rumah saudara area Perak je. Itu pun tak sampai ke Bota, Parit, Lambor, Chemor.. Paling jauh pun ke Lumut.

Cousin lelaki selamat bertunang. Alhamdulillah. Dia muda dua tahun dari aku. Tapi jodohnya sampai dulu kot. :) Masa dia sekolah dulu, dia pernah bagitahu aku, dia tak nak solo lama-lama. Nak cepat kahwin. He's 24 years old now. Sesuai lah kot? Bagus kan macam mana sesetengah orang tu boleh determine and reach their target as they wanted?

Dan Alhamdulillah juga kerana abangku selamat menghantar rombongan merisik berjumpa dengan keluarga sang kekasih hati. Kampung girlfriend abang aku tu cantik wo.. tepi sawah. Best. Untuk anak-anak bandar macam kami, agak excited sikit lah bila sampai tu. Mula lah mulut mengomel..

"Alongg.. kalau photo shoot kahwin kat sini lawa ni, Long!"

Tiba-tiba biawak besar gila melintas tengah jalan..

"BIAWAK!!!"

Biawak pun jakun. Biawak tu tak jakun pun tengok kitorang.

Adik-adik girlfriend abang aku comel.. Jambu. Haha. So ketika discussion, pada mulanya tarikh pertunangan ditetapkan pada 23 October. Pastu aku yang dengar dari jauh ni rasa macam aku tak free je. Pastu teringat aku ada kelas kat Uitm. Aku pun sms ibu, cakap aku dan adik aku ada kelas/exam.

Mak aku yang duduk sekali dengan mereka yang tengah berbincang tu pun bagitahu hal tu.. So diorang anjak ke 30 October. Aku tak sure pulak la time ni aku still ada kelas ke tak. So aku diam je.

Esoknya baru teringat nak check, rupa-rupanya aku ada presentation pulak. Takkan nak minta pihak perempuan tunda lagi kan? Macam tak manis la pulak..

So entah lah.. Looks like I've to skip the presentation.

Then masa sarung cincin.. actually ingatkan takde upacara menyarung cincin ni.. Bukan selalunya pihak lelaki pass je ke cincin tu kat family perempuan? Time discussion nak habis, perut aku memulas-mulas. Kacau betul. Bila dah tak tahan, terus tanya kakak si perempuan, "Err.. toilet kat mana ek? Nak tumpang boleh?"

Time aku tengah syok dalam toilet tu lah.. diorang sarung cincin. Aku cam dengar sayup-sayup bunyi orang baca doa. "Eh, dah habis ke?" aku duk terfikir sorang-sorang. Terus sudahkan apa yang perlu, then bergegas keluar.. sambil main-main mata sikit dengan adik dia (haha).. Diorang dah nak start makan dah pun. Wu wuu I missed the moment. I was supposed to be the one who took the photos. Aishh.

Anyway aku minta nak incharge hantaran. Sebab aku tengok cousin aku punya hantaran tak best. Haha. Too 90's. So sebelum mak-mak sedara interfere, baik aku take over. :P

Ok masuk cerita sedih pulak.

Al-kisah saya kehilangan Iphone 3Gs yang baru saya beli 3 bulan sudah.

Hilang dekat kedai runcit. Malas pulak nak cerita detail. Menyakitkan hati. Apa pun yang pasti aku pun tak tau apa yang berlaku. Tiba-tiba je handphone tiada di tangan bila aku dah masuk kereta on the way nak balik rumah. Kedai tu dekat je dengan rumah, seminit sampai. Pastu kebetulan dah dekat dengan rumah, aku terus masuk porch, parking dan cari henfon. Sekali takde. Aku cam eh, jatuh ke? Apa lagi tunggang terbalik aku cari.

Tak jumpa.

Lari masuk rumah, terus call nombor sendiri. Bila dengar ada ringing tone, letak gagang atas meja. Terus lari keluar ke kereta. Memang saya berlari ok. Sambil tu cari telefon sambil dengar kot-kot ada ringing tone.

Takde.

So masa ni aku ala-ala dah pasrah dah lah. Tapi tak nak give up lagi so aku pecut balik gi kedai tu. At the same time, kawan-kawan on the way ni nak datang beraya. Aku tanya kedai tu.. of course la dia cakap takde kan. Standard lah. Tapi tokei dia mintak no fon aku. Dia try call then dia cakap, "Masuk voicemail. Itu orang sudah ambil lah tu."

Wah.

Aku pun balik sambil dalam hati mengucap je. Baru je sampai rumah, kawan-kawan pun sampai. Pergh.. kelam kabut lah aku. Laksa tak celur lagi.

Agak sugul dan selekeh la aku masa tu. My mind was so distracted but glad friends cheered me up.

So hilanglah ribu-ribuan sms ku.. dan gambar sebanyak 800+ di mana 90% tak sempat transfer.. dan nombor rakan-rakan..

Ok next.

Kawan aku hilang kereta hari ni.

Ok seterusnya.

Kepada kamu.. (eventhough you don't understand Malay very well.. I don't care :P )

I hope you stay strong for what happened. Nyatanya Allah itu lebih sayangkan dia. I do feel your loss.. so much it touched my heart. :(

Semoga Allah terus kurniakan kamu dan famili kekuatan dan kecekalan hati. Saya selalu doa itu. It's not an easy thing to deal with, losing our parent. Apa kamu lalui itu sesungguhnya sangat berat nak dipikul.

I will always be here for you, trying hard to be the best friend you ever had. You know that, right?

Begitu juga kamu, twin.. be strong.. I'm always here if you need someone to talk to.

Semoga roh arwah dicucuri rahmat dan ditempatkan di kalangan orang-orang yang beriman. Amin.

Beri mereka kekuatan, ya Allah..



Al-Fatihah.

Eid Mubarak

 Too lazy for words. Enjoy the photos. Selamat hari Raya, everyone. Have a blessed Syawal! ^_^

 Pre-Raya Photo Shoot. Sengal habis.

  

 

 

 
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Ye..Saye memang tak pandai ambil gambar serius2 ni.

 Raya Dua Ribu Sepuluh.

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Selepas solat Raya Aidilfitri.

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Antara kanak-kanak yang datang beraya. Sangat comel mereka ini! ^_^

Si kecik : Cantiknye bajuu..

Saya : Haha.. Terima kasih.
Si kecik : Kenapa akak tak datang rumah saya hari tu?
Saya : Hari tu belum raya lagi, dik.. Macam mana akak nak datang.

Si kecik : Ish.. Saya sunat lah!
Saya : Hahahaha.. *gelak tanpa henti*

Kemudian Mak Long datang.. 

Saya : Mak Long, tadi yang kecik ni cerita dia baru sunat..
Mak Long : Ohh iye ke? Baru sunat? Ha mana.. nak tengok betul ke dah sunat.. (seloroh saje)

Si kecik : Nihh.. (lalu dia lucutkan seluar depan Mak Long)

Mak Long : Ohhh.. betul lah dah kudung!

Saya : Hahahaha.. *gelak tanpa henti*

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Siblings.

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Along sengal unta.

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With my one and only brother.

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Danial yang menjadikan saya alas tilam untuk beliau melakukan terjun junam berulang kali.

 

 

Woiii dah nak rayeeeeeeeeee!!

Ok lambat pulak wish kali ni. Sorry lah.. Sedikit kemalasan memakan jiwa.

Actually sekarang trend wish dekat Facebook. Tapi memandangkan saya bukan peminat Facebook, dan dah ramai sangat tag-tag ni.. Takut menimbulkan rasa jelak pula. Jadi saya buat di sini saja.. sebab saya lebih sayangkan blog saya. Sangat berjasa blog ni tau.. Kerana dia, Allah temukan saya dengan seorang sahabat yang sangat special di hati saya. Yu, jangan buat statement yang boleh menimbulkan mudarat ke atas diri sendiri.

Mmmm.. apa ye nak cakap.. Korang raya kat mana? Haha ok tak tanya camni?

Baju raya kali ni tiga pasang. Tak kisah beli banyak pun sebab nak pakai gi kerja. Dah siap tapi takde tudung. Samada aku rembat je mana ada, atau pun nanti pergi beli. Malas siot. Tengok lah macam mana.

Kuih raya... order dua jenis je. Satu balang dah selamat habis. Yang lain, ibu dah order. Banyak lak tu. So malas nak tambah. Abah pulak suka beli kerepek dan kacang. Yang habiskan nanti bukan tetamu, tapi anak-anak dia.

Erm apa lagi ye pasal Raya ni.. tadi macam banyak je idea. Haha. Bagi mereka yang balik ke Ipoh.. Singgah rumah ye. =)

Oo Raya kali ni sama macam tahun-tahun lepas. Single je. So, statement ini dapat menjawab mana-mana spekulasi, perhaps? Along je dah lain sekarang. Kini ada teman. :)

Aaa tahun ni macam malas je nak bagi duit raya.. Bagi biskut boleh, dik? Atau secebis kasih sayang ke?

Tahun ni tak pasang pelita. Takde effort nak pasang. Haha. Dah nak raya ni baru nak fikir. Cam rugi je. Minyak gas dah mahal lak tu. Ramai yang dah tak pasang. Maybe pasang lampu kelip-kelip tu je. Hahah.

Okay lah.. Nak buat wish raye ni.

Pada semua makhluk Allah kat dunia ni yang menyambut Hari Raya, salam lebaran saya ucapkan.. Ada serangkap pantun saya karang dalam masa dua minit hari tu atas sebab urgency dan setelah didesak oleh staf saya untuk diletak dalam ucapan Raya department kami. I'm not good at writing pantun seriously. So here it goes.. eherm.. *clears throat*

Sayup bergema takbir Raya,

Redup hati memanjat kesyukuran,

Salam dihulur maaf dipinta,

Mohon keberkatan di hari Lebaran.

Lemang dan rendang satu kemestian

Di meja tersusun pelbagai hidangan

Salam Aidilfitri ingin diucapkan

Sambutlah ia penuh kesederhanaan

Oh ada dua rangkap rupanya.

Ok secara personal, saya nak ucapkan selamat hari raya pada family.. abah, ibu, along dan iena. Dan cousins..anak buah, mak pak sedara.. maaf zahir batin.. Malas tulis panjang-panjang lah.. nanti nak mintak maaf secara live gak kan. Haha.

Secondly, kepada sahabat-sahabat yang dekat di hati.. Jap, let me try to list out these important names.. hopefully I won't miss out anyone..

Sha, Fieza, Zura, Jannah, Syakiera, Melal, kak Raina, Shamam, kak Mar, Shidi, Fezal.. You're my true friends and I thank God I got the chance to know you guys. Thanks for everything. Salam Aidilfitri..Raya please datang ke rumah. :) Minta maaf banyak-banyak atas salah dan silap. Eventhough I'm far away from you, please let me stay close to your heart, alright? I don't text/contact you that much does not make me forget you guys. Ingat tu ok, Shidi!

To my juniors.. Simaa, Naema, Amni, Sahli dan kawan-kawan MMU yang lain.. Icun (tunggu emel dari saye!), Faiz (orang kampung wuhuu!! Datang ghomah wei!), kak G, Bern, kak Ya, Napi, Memel, Brahim, kak Lin, Elya, Izmi, Tapai.. sapa lagi nih.. haha... SELAMAT HARI RAYA! Maaf zahir dan batin ye.

Kepada geng TWITTER!! Cik Eita, Mimi, Farina, kak Azma.. Imran Ajmain, Ashraf Muslim, eh tetiba lak kan. haha.. Aida, Nisa, Huda..Ian..Nana Ali.. Keep on tweeting please! You guys are one of the reasons I can't stop tweeting. Selamat hari raya, guys.. Maaf zahir batin.

Kepada rakan-rakan lain.. yang juga dekat di hati.. Eva (kurangkan melucah di hari Raya! HAHA) , Alin, Fazlin, kak Siti, Wani, Aril - my twin, Nane, Asfia, Barium.. Kawan-kawan UiTM, Lyn (banyaknya kawan aku nama Lin), Izzah, Shaza (congrats on ur Ramadhan baby!), Shaz, Dyna (u dah bersalin ke agaknye ye..), kak Zu dan lain-lain, Selamat hari Raya semua~ Maaf kalau ada salah dan silap.

Oih siapa lagi ni.

Hopefully I don't miss out anyone. If I do, I'm sorry. I have a poor memory. But I forget now, doesn't mean I forget later. Haha. Ok tak alasan?

Last but not least, to someone so close to my heart.. You know who you are. :) It's been such a pleasure to know you. I am so glad that I got the chance to be someone to you and hopefully this true friendship will last forever. You filled up the emptiness in my heart and I can never thank you enough for that. Hopefully you'll have a blessed and meaningful Raya this year. InsyaAllah. Thanks for everything. I look forward for another 100 Raya with you. :) I know I've hurt you a lot and I am deeply sorry. I know it's not easy for what we had to go through so let's pray together that we will stay strong ok? Selamat hari Raya, you.

Okeh tu je.. Gambar apa lak nak bubuh ni.. Google jap la. Nak edit2 tak pandai. Tak kuasa pun. Haha. (sejam setengah berlalu..) Ha malas lah nak ciplak keje orang. Aku buat sendiri je. Hahaha.. I'm not an Art student. Tempek-tempek sudeh. Malas nak pikir. Jenuh siot cari brush. Last-last ranting kering gak aku pilih. HAHAHAH. Bengong.

Ye lah, ye lah.. kang aku buat lain. Nak publish dulu, tak kira.

(UPDATE: ok dah tukar. ni pun hasil pemalas gak. Nak balik dah ni.. yippieee~!!)

Ok, akhir kata,

SELAMAT HARI RAYA to all my blog readers! Thanks for dropping by. :)

(previous image)

What gives you despair, so that you don't become arrogant, is truth.

(via selvselv)

Love is blind; hate is deaf.

I have to do a review on any IT product based on their HCI (Human-Computer Interaction) for my current assignment.

So I did some googling to find reviews as to collect some useful information. I did find some bad reviews which are absolutely normal. But there's even a web where you can throw your loathes towards this application and people sent such negative comments with all the F words and cursed all the way they want. Now is the application that bad till you have to lose your temper like that?

I'm not only talking about this particular hate website. In fact people are cursing and complaining so bad via any medium they can find especially the Internet. I mean, come on.. Life is too short to be spent with those negative feelings right?

It's not wrong to dislike anything or anybody.

But when you put a real effort like creating a Facebook page or website just to show your hates towards something, it's just ridiculous and immature. Facebook especially, I found so many hate Pages towards celebrities, politicians, etc. Seriously, what did you get from all these? Some kind of satisfaction? The feeling of proud? Lie to me not, you'll never ever feel satisfied cause you just can't stop throwing your tantrum there, right? So how can you ever be satisfied if you can't stop cursing on that particular being?

Unless you're doing it to gain some justice over wrong things that the person did or trying to fix what's broken or trying to voice out the truths that should not be jeopardized, something beneficial I mean, then I can understand. But still it doesn't mean you can use all the harsh words and labelling them with such bad titles.

If you're creating it just because you hate her personality, or just because he carried a bad character in his movie, or just because he's a politician from the other party than you're supporting, and these people had nothing to do with your life.. I have to say you guys need to grow up.

Just stop hating unnecessarily, dude.

I do loath some celebrities that I think bring a shame to my gender or my race or my religion, but seriously I don't have time to spend on hating them every minute.

I have lots of better things to do than busy hating people who freaking don't know me.

Image Credit : purplerainistaken